Mistakes

Today was a day that was full of mistakes.
Which I guess is normal, since I have just finished two large drawings the day before last. I think what next and then I start scribbling and sketching and then I am so freaking burned out but I think I can push through it but I know, you know. I know. I know I should stop and rest and ride out the tired and then I can start again.
But I am dramatic and often swing into panic mode. If I can’t paint/ draw/ make a master piece today – then I never will!

So I keep on going and then I stuffed up two drawings. TWO. Just test drawings but still, it’s nice paper and I feel bad. Also one was of my daughter, I ruined it by going a little too crazy shading in her back and that just made it all the more WORSE. It actually looks quite ugly and I’m like HOW CAN YOU DO THAT TO A DRAWING OF YOUR DAUGHTER WHO IS THE MOST BEAUTIFUL THING ON THIS EARTH! YOU ARE SO EVIL.

Mother guilt seeps into the art.

So I went out for lunch and angrily drank tea and then did the groceries and the laundry and I have salvaged the part of the drawing I didn’t ruin and have now expressed myself in words here and tomorrow is a new day.

flowers1_lily_mae_martin